A Personal Journey : Into a New Year

The Goal is Simple,

Be Better than Yesterday

Welcome back to you all I’ve been on a bit of a hiatus unsure of how to go about writing in this new year? First of all Happy New Year to all of my readers, I hope you’re still here. When I take a break this long I often wonder who I’ll lose and keep. I just needed some time to figure some things out before I start again. Figuring reset is better than regret as I came pretty close to calling this blog quits. As you can see I’ve smartly change my mind, out of a dark place knowing now that I can thrive. So, what’s next for me as we hurdle through time and space? Not really sure yet. One thing is for certain though I’ve become even more comfortable than ever in my own skin. Life will throw you shitstorms, it’s how we dig deep and weather the storm taking it all in. Letting it take over your life will only take you down a lonely road, one that I do not wish to follow. Here I am back and ready to go, to make writing a priority in 2025 doing my part to make it better than ever. We all have our highs and lows while on this blue marble hurtling through the universe. It’s in those lows when you find out who you truly are and also develop stronger connections with those who truly care about you and in my case good, no, great friends, family and sometimes people whom have just entered you life. I feel anyones case this is what it takes to be successful and happy, oops, along with help from my doctors and health care team. This year will be unlike any other as everyone knows I enter into a world of possibilities as well as the unknown. The key to moving forward is working on one’s self making my body and mind stronger, healthier and more focused on preicous time. Putting together verses and quotes to remind my life come but just once, don’t waste it, don’t blink. We all have our own piece of greatness inside, go find it, go after it. No place upon a bench, go after what you want. If you fail f*ck it, get up and try again. Failing is learning, do again and again and again! One last thing, don’t give a sh#t what others think in the end you will succeed, YOU will win!

No Matter how good or Bad your Life is,

wake up each morning and be thankful that you still have one.

The Latest Health Update

Now just a quick update after a call from my doctor. First off when you’re in between your six month CAT scan, at the three month point it’s usually the bloodwork and urine update time. Now many of us have with NETS have started to cast doubt’s on we still do the 5HIAA test because depending on your region the diet restrictions are often different. If you talk with an American patient they kind of laugh and ask, “you still do that?” “We’ve had that test done through our blood for years. That is our health care, it’s free, but for the most part we lag behind on many of the up to date testing done. Not just for cancer, but also many types of diseases. For most of you out there you know I still carry that jug with pride, what can I do it’s been part of my life for nearly five years now? Now its colour is orange to help disguise its contents. I always thought it was funny after losing the fear of what people think, carrying my clear jug in a bag covered up. For the last couple years walking the hospital hall with that clear container and its content on full display, a smile on my face as people would give me funny looks. It’s almost sometimes refreshing what cancer has done for me, (try) to stop worrying, move on and give the right people respect. It really is that simple.

Forever Good-Byes

We all have that time(s) in our lives when forever good byes are needed, a death happens or just are what they are. In my life I’ve had my share of forever byes whether it’d be friends no longer needed, relationships or losing a loved one. Losing friends unexpectedly to a life ending tragedy is one of the toughest of all, watching family members lose a battle with cancer is another one that cuts hard. Death itself is the ultimate good-bye. Then there are the other types and one just happened to me. During that phone call with my Oncologist I chatted with him longer than we normally would. I knew it would the last between us both. I jokingly told him, ” You can’t go!”

He was the one who called me to tell me the news that changed my life forever in a caring tone. Together we learned about this rare disease working as a team, he watched me cry, also laugh at jokes. Even while I sit here tears begin to fall as I type about this forever good-bye, cancer has made me a softy now. He told me I’d be left in good hands, while I understand selfishly I’m upset. Life will go on and I’m sure my next oncologist will be just fine, but as a patient the bond and trust between your first doctor for me anyway, will be hard to find. I wished him well, hung up the phone, grabbed a tissue to dab away my tears that had start to flow.

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