The Cost of Value
Well a couple of weeks have gone by, but hey better than months again, right? Before I get into my latest health update I’m just going to briefly touch on something. I have been taking stock again of my life, I know I have talked about the importance of time and that it’s mine (and your) most precious commodity. This time though it’s not so much time, but who or what brings value to that time or to get right down to it, your life. Along this journey of mine I’ve started to realize what that “value” is starting to look like. I’ve read in many places where it’s been said, “all we really need is a few good friends and family.” I believe this not to be true. My life is rich with friends, many who hold much value to my life. All in many different ways, whether it’s a phone call from an old school friend, a work buddy who actually asks truly how you are? Somebody new with the same type of hobbies. Then you reflect back and mentally go through that list, many who you once trusted, loved, cared are a fleeting imagine of what you may have thought about them at one time.
As this story of mine continues along people come and go, some have stayed far too long, some very new. Cancer itself evolves as I do. It looks for weakness ready to attack, like some of those in your life. Draining you of the enjoyment of a stress free life. My life is full, my life is happy, my life moves forward and will leave those of no value behind. Think of this yourself when you’re quiet and alone. Who do you enjoy talking with, being around, is there give and take? Do they listen to you? Is it all about them? Do you actually like this person or hobby, job? Whatever it is maybe it is time to take stock with some aspects of life. I have begun.
The Old Health Update
Sorry that got a little long winded, but something I’ll circle around to that topic during some upcoming posts, maybe? When we last spoke I was heading in for a CAT scan. It’s been a while since I explained how the process works, so here’s a quick refresher. Usually when contrast is involved you can’t eat or drink four hours ahead of time (there’s also another reason for me personally). Now that all my health care is at Vic in London the scan is a little different. A) It’s huge and a lot of people are waiting. B) I’m now a number, makes scheduling easier C) It’s back to drinking the Barium solution, gross.
Bring along a book to keep myself company, there is really no sense in having someone wait with you every time. Filling a seat some patient may need and it’s very boring. After checking in and changing into some pyjama bottoms I wait. A very nice volunteer brings me my drink, it’s a bland tasting peach flavour. No choice like in Brantford, dam I miss that cranberry flavour. You’re allowed an hour to drink it, but I get after that sweet juice and have it done within fifteen minutes. Lie, I just want this part over with. At about the hours time the nurse comes and brings me into the scanning room and I lay on the platform. It’s a cold, sterile room they do have a nice painting on the ceiling to try and take your mind off things (I guess). Because my scan requires dye as well an I.V. is put in. Guess what? The first vein doesn’t take. I have some very distinct ones, so I don’t know how they miss and it’s not the first time. Thankfully when he moves to the other arm the needle hits the right spot. For ten minutes the table runs you back and forth through the machine. Then it’s the best part the dye is injected and warms you from the back of your throat until just when you think it’s over, the warm feeling reaches the nether regions and yup I feel as though I’m peeing myself. I’ve honestly thought about wearing depends in there just in case. Thankfully I’ve never had an accident. Then it’s over and I attempt to find my way out of this massive, still new to me hospital and find my waiting ride. Her smile easing my angst.
We head home, about an hour later all those chemical start to wreak havoc on my body. Constant upset gut, along with fatigue plague me for the rest of the day and into the next. I’m careful what to eat, usually breads, light foods (if any) and a lot of water until my gut calms and I start feeling normal. Anyone else who goes through this, water is the key, even a sports drink all those chemicals leaving your body, sometimes quickly strip you sugars and salt. Given my vast experience now doing these scan that is my advice and it works well for me. Within a day or two I’m relatively back to myself. Maybe some of you don’t feel awful after the CAT scan, consider yourself fortunate.
My Results Are In
As you all know about six month ago I had a slight uptick on the size of a few of my tumors (we’re talking millimetres). The nuclear radiologist and oncology board still considered my case not ready for any type of radiation. Which would have been a treatment called PRRT, I’ll explain when the time comes. After five and a half years with minimal growth I dodged a bullet, the second time.
Now for what you are waiting for. I received a call from the nuclear radiologist about a week and a half ago, actually it was his resident. Usually a good sign when they call. The young man explained that preliminary results showed no new growth or spread, same goes for the spots that had shown some growth six months ago. Yah! Once again I’m in the clear for another six months when the process will start again. Good news as stable is what we want to hear when dealing with Neuroendocrine cancer. We head to Chuck’s Roadhouse for a burger and a cold one.
You may ask yourself, how am I not a bundle of nerves all the time? Knowing that in, just what? Five months from now I’ll have to go through this all again. Truth is I am, I’ve just figured a way to push most of those worries to the back seat and attempt to live in the moment. It’s not always easy, but with a great support group around me and a great Phycologist to talk with this journey I’m (we’re) all on will continue for some time. By that I mean I’m out living you all. LOL.
As usual love for all, thanks for stopping by and please support the blog by subscribing, commenting and liking. Cheers, Steve
Cancer Won't Run My Life 