Off We Go : A New Story Begins

Stop pursuing , when not pursued

Respect those who only Respect you

Dump the Extra Baggage

Learn to you Love yourself First

Only the insecure uses someone to validate themselves

Be well, Be kind…but only if given in return

Learn, Adjust, Stick to core values

Make Mistakes, fail, remembering that’s how you learn

Life will be a Struggle, it will be a Cruel, Dark place

Soon enough a Light will shine

And We Win!

As I open a fresh page and start this new story, the paper or screen in this case is blank, empty, no instructions included. Like the cheap products purchased off Amazon. It comes with no direction so it’s up to me (you) put on my big boy pants and follow that inner compass. What do I do? Where do I go? How did I get here? Many questions start to swell. At 51, single, stage 4 cancer what the hell does this world have for me? I easily could sit and feel sorry for myself, let life pass by getting nothing out of it. I have every excuse if I so choose to use it, sick, tired and why even bother? Life itself can be quite a bi$ch. I think most of you who read this know me to well, off we go now into a brand new life no F*ucks left to give, life it far too short to care about what people think. Some people never really wake up and at the age of 51 this one is ready to go!

The first thing to do is work on one’s self, being comfortable in my (your) own skin. It’s something I’m already pretty good with and kind of always been. Looking in the mirror seeing who you are, where you’ve come from, now also where you are? I try not to pretend to know what the future holds, I rather live in the moment instead of attempting to write a script and follow it along. Just getting comfortable again in this new found life. It starts again with writing this blog. The only thing I carry forward into the new story of Stephen. I’ve read many books over the years on, “how to improve yourself”. Some are pretty good, others bull shit, most have never lived through rough times in their lives. Pay for a certificate and now you know it all….Come on, some people are so full of it.

I’ll never pretend I’ve experience true suffering, but my life has been far from perfect and it’s taught me a lot. Below I’m going to start compiling my list things to live by, a guide let’s say of how I plan to live life out. Not everyone will probably agree and that’s fine, the best part about life is simple, choice. Which leads me into number one on the list.

• Stop giving a Shit what others think! Live how you want, hell write your own code. Anyone who speaks badly about you, probably hates their own life and like them only looks to tear you down. Be bold, happy where you are or change it, write that book or blog, travel alone (far from a loser, you’re strong!). I used to worry about how I looked, things I said, now guess what? I don’t care. Your a force to be reckoned with, just start to believe it
• Everyone’s probably heard this a million times, do your best to exercise. Just do the best that you can, especially while you’re able. Walk the block, join a class, curl that can of peas that been sitting in your cupboard for years. When I was first diagnosed one of the first things I asked my oncologist was if I still could jog and workout. His very direct answer was, “Yes, please!” Followed by, ” I wish everyone would ask me that.” It’s vital when healthy, it’s vital when sick to maintain a strong body to fight off any unsuspected guest. Of course in my case that guest is cancer as you all know and I often wonder is it because I’m active and strong? Is that the reason why it really hasn’t grown much at all? Of course we are all going to go through our starts and stops when it comes to this. Make it a habit just don’t quit, one day it will become automatic and you’ll be rewarded for it.
• Eat in Moderation, diet is always a hot topic. It’s one that’s often discussed during our cancer group sessions. I’ve touched on this topic in the past, but adding it to the list makes it last. So, it’s kind of like it says I do my best to spread things out, try not to over eat, enjoy and eat food slowly why rush? We all have Netflix the same show will be there in an hour. I’m trying now to not snack after 7 p.m. it’s tricky, but if I cheat it’s an apple or some kind of fruit or veggie. Shit, lie, last night a handful of chips. But I’m getting better.
• Learn something new, since I like to travel to Latin countries I’m attempting to Habla Español. Keep my brain busy and useful, is important when you have cancer or you’ll end up ion a fog. I simply downloaded babble to start, got a decent foundation going now. I may decide to take a Spanish course. Whatever your passion, something you want to try go do it. You’ll feel instantly better and that smile will return to your face, try the guitar, dance lessons or hell I’ll take ya into wilderness canoe camp, sleep in a tent. Get out of the daily grind start to find something new about yourself.
• Cultivate meaningful relationships. Surround yourself with intelligent, interesting people who add light to your light. Whether It’s true old friends, bonds with those made through experiences or a fresh face you might just have met. Those who challenge you, make you really think. Ones who make you smile and feel lighter inside. Helping you put together this puzzle we call life. We can use a trusting hand in that.

That is just a few of the principles I’ll, myself attempt to live by in this new found life story. It’s not to sound preachy, but just to give everyone here a glimpse into maybe adjusting the way you think. I’ll still make many mistakes myself because I’m only human. As we press along I’m sure to add many more or adjust these principals. It’s the story of life and how she goes. Sometimes it’s sucks, sometimes it’s great, sometimes it is what it is. Other times it’s waiting and seeing what happens, to see where part of this story will take you.

If you like the content please consider subscribing, like and drop me a comment. If you want to leave your name in the comment that would be great so I can personalize the reply. Only if you want to. All this would help me grow this blog to help reach others. Cheers, Stephen